Matlab jokes or puns

Are there any good Matlab jokes? I don't mean why or any other Easter eggs, I mean good jokes involving Matlab. Actually, that bar may be a bit too high. Any jokes, good or bad, let's hear 'em.

[Sean de Wolski]

If the bar is too high, you can lower it.

>> bar(flip(sort(rand(1,2))))

[Andrew]

What did the string say to the rope variable?

[John D'Errico]

I don't know, I can't find the thread.

[Alberto Uriel]

Q: Why did the 30-60-90 triangle marry the 45-45-90 triangle? A: They were right for each other

[Senthil]

reversible is efficient than irreversible

[Daniel Salles Chevitarese]

trying to be funny - anyone help me?

[Sam]

Type "spy" on command window of Matlab R2013a to see a real spy!

[Ahmad Hably]

She >> You don't love me anymore...

Engineer >> What, What are you saying... why?

She >> Tell me then.. Who is that "matlab" that you mentioned while you're sleeping ...

She >> No, "Matlab", she is my assistant in work. In addition, she is married to "Simulink" since 1984.

Engineer's Wife >> ok

[Sam Fincham]

You know what's odd?

Every other number.

[Niteen Autade]

Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.

[Giovanni Buscaglia]

The average maths joke is pretty mean

[Hossam Mossa]

Math is like love; a simple idea, but it can get complicated.

[Michael Newtown]

Do you know a statistics joke? Probably, but it is mean.

[Andrew McLaren]

These are so bad, my NaN could do better!

[Sean Doyle]

There are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

[Corey Reuter]

What do organic mathematicians throw into their fireplaces? Natural Logs.

[Emerson Batista]

"The order of the tractors do not change the viaduct", the same as the order of the factors does not alter the product.

[Martin Martínez]

Yes, I changed my World of Warcraft by Matlab * - *!

[Jaime Señor]

-Do you know the symbol of the sodium? -NAh

[Joseph Clay]

Why was 6 afraid of 7? -Because 7 8 9!

[William Grefe]

Why is a math book always unhappy?

Because it always has lots of problems.

[sarath manchala]

matlab is not mat in a lab

[emil axell]

Why do you use matlab to create plots and graphs? Because its so easy to implement in my Latex documents.

Said no social studies student ever

[Henrique Hesse]

why do I wait? semicolon

[Siddharth Kumar]

Joey: What are up to these days brah?

Chandler: Nothing much bruh, Just busy with my labs.

Joey: Oh, I'm also quite busy with my lab.

chandler: But bro, you don't have any labs this semester.

Joey: I have bro, MAT_LAB!

*Joey will be Joey*

[Hangxu Zhou]

Matlab = MAd Through LAB

[Jon]

There needs to be a matlab script that can calculate what the color of nine (9) smells like

[Tomás]

How many simulationists does it take to replace a lightbulb? Infinity: Each one builds a fully validated model, but the light actually never goes on.

[Suleman]

She >> You don't love me anymore... Engineer >> What, What are you saying... why? She >> Tell me then.. Who is that "matlab" that you mentioned while you're sleeping ... She >> No, "Matlab", she is my assistant in work. In addition, she is married to "Simulink" since 1984. Engineer's Wife >> ok my favorite

[Fasih ur Rehman]

In our Local Language here in Pakistan when we write MATLAB during chat conversations it is falsely interpreted by our friends. Because Matlab in Urdu means " meaning" . Its funny when People ask you if you did Matlab assignment when speaking Urdu.

[Benjamin Tinlin]

Well played. Poor exp (x) :(

[Jose Alan Badillo Montes]

a fool walks into a bar, takes a look around and says "Hello world!" xD.

[Bruce]

Allow me to go off on a tangent about the famous Indian chief, SoaCahToa!

[sumit shinde]

There is need to work on .tgf file for meshing

[SURAJ]

Why a man always dream that his wish of MATLAB comes true ? Because according to him MATLAB also means * | | May all the Lakes are BEER||*.

[ajan]

Simulations can be run again and again ...but life has no retakes

[Piper Hill]

What's green and homeomorphic to the open unit interval?

The real lime!!!

[Piper Hill]

What's purple and commutes?

An abelian grape!

[NING]

while not succeeded
try again
end

[Abedalsalam Bani-Ahmed]

What is the actual translation of Matlab in Arabic

A laboratory died!!! True story :)

[Pratyush Talreja]

What's the Object oriented way of becoming wealthy? A: Inheritance

[Michael Jarboe]

way to make me crash my MatLab...

%LB Sim
sys = 'LB_Simulationist';
open_system(sys);

run(sys);
% Lightbulb == 1 (On) // == 0 OFF

Lightbulb = simout.data;
num_sims = 1;

while Lightbulb <= 0

      run(sys);
      Lightbulb = simout.data;
      num_sims = num_sims + 1;
  end

[Patrick Delaney]

What do the wise sages use and search for during life? मतलब!

(please copy and paste that into Google translate and look at the English pronunciation and the Hindi translation)

[003 003]

Everytime I transfer the type of an image, like

I = single(imread("one_image.jpg"));

I always repeat silently, 'single'. And there shall never be one image. So I repeat again and again.

[Nixon Xavier]

MATLAB = Man At Table Losing Appetite and Beer

[John Ware]

"help" is a great feature in Matlab...and one day while looking for a function shortcut i found this gem.. and laughed

>> help fun

fun not found.

[v.agrawal]

if you == have_a_little_time
   disp('Great! You are reading my comment.')
elseif you == have_no_time
   disp('Oh man! How you can be so busy?')
else
   disp('There is lots of fun.')
end

[Muhammad Imran]

Good Joke

[Hyunuk Ha]

haha, I don't know hot to react...

[Nirakar Pradhan]

hahhaha

[Ruben Gomez]

lol ahaahhahaha

[Bhaskar Mitra]

wow

[StefanLSN]

Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.

[surya narayana]

:)

[Matthew Sisson]

hold on

[dp phung]

nice...

[Josh]

hold on

[Himanshu Makhija]

Plot on

[peter ateshian]

its a LabMat! Labrador on a Mat

[guilherme correa]

Do you clear all the mess in your room?

[Rohan Patil]

Matlab is so possessive that it wont let Simulink interact with us without it!

[Tiffany Ge]

What does Matlab call its grandmother? NaN

[Lela Bralovic]

Of course, Simulink is deserved to be under control.

[Nyunsu Kim]

What a funny community!

[Sascha Nicklisch]

What is the sign on the door of an internet hacker? 'Gone Phishing' :)

[Amir Khan]

>>Funny Coding at Matlab.

[mujeeb rehman]

give printf command to get a easter eggs :)

[David Manuel Buitrago Montañez]

Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right? A: 1

[Sunny Desai]

Matlab could have been as cool as Batman if it had one LESS letter l and one New N!

[Rathin Joshi]

MATLAB Jokes... Compilation Error... !!! Lol

[Cesar Bibiano]

hold the door;

[Luis Tomas Calvario-Velasquez]

:B

[Pedram MASOUDI]

V=[cos(pi/180*Min(j,D))*cos(pi/180*Min(j,Dip)) ...
  sin(pi/180*Min(j,D))*cos(pi/180*Min(j,Dip)) ...
  -sin(pi/180*Min(j,Dip))];)

Error: Unbalanced or unexpected parenthesis or bracket.

I found it: it is winking at the end of the code ;)

[ANKUR SINGH]

My teacher asked me to bring calculator in class, so i brought MATLAB.

[Alex]

Can you figure out the plot?

[Elisa Sabbat]

Two coordinates are talking. What did one coordinate say to the other ?

"I do see your point"

[Sandy]

I can see your "view", but your "point" is totally out of "plot".

[Abdo TIFIRASS]

Yes of course

[xueqian zhang]

How to calc my aeroplane?

By hand or MATLAB!!

[hussien rashad]

Calc the area under the plane

[ZHEN YU CHAN]

Always

[Mohamed Awadallah]

Australian people say Matlab but say Maaalab

[Lynette Bustos]

   >>social life
    Undefined function or variable 'social'.

    Did you mean:
    >> scal life

Yes, sorry MatLab I did mean "scal life"...

[Masoud Afrakhteh]

Spent one month trying to fix Maaalab code....

Missing one period :(

[Michelle Bundy]

Make one error with matlab...

Copy Delete Paste...

Wait That's Maple.

[Markus Hail]

How many programmers are needed to change a light bulb? NaN, it`s a hardwareproblem.

[Matej Pacha]

A manager and a programmer are travelling by car for a business meeting. Suddenly, the car engine fails and the manager says: "what should we do now? Can you fix it?" "Sure, it's easy, I do it every time my PC fails - let's get off the car, wait for a while and then get in again!"

[Fatemeh ansari]

in Persian language has title meaning

[siddartha vellanki]

In hindi language matlab means meaning

[Sajib Kumar Chaudhury]

What will be the sum of "love" ?? How could be even "love" have

 sum. But matlab knows...

[sivaram b]

While function and Wife function are similar in nature. while(1) :loop will always be executed with out any break; wife(1) :wife gives only one option to listen to her which should be executed by husband with out any excuse

[V BHANU NAIDU]

nice one

[V BHANU NAIDU]

Why did the inmate want to learn Matlab? Just for cellfun.

[SOMYA JAIN]

nice one

[kailas jadhav]

Any jokes, good or bad, let's hear it.

[sandeep kumar]

><The real joke is I don't know about MATLAB><

[Emmet Sheerin]

Why do mathematicians always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25

[Daniel Linares]

I love jokes

[ganbayar batchuluun]

i dont know it could be a joke but anyway it is here: People tell me write code in C++ because matlab is slow and c++ is fastest, but matlab is faster when i test it using lot of GUI for real.

[Anushi1998]

It seems matlab is faster than C++

[Muhammed Ali TASKIN]

I love MATLAB

[ganesh zambre]

MATLAB is allrounder!!

[Sai Kalluri]

Wanna keep MATLAB busy with single command.

pause(inf);

:P

[Firnas Ahamed]

wanna create an m-file which could make someone fall in love with me...What is the code for???Can any1 suggest:)

[Yeong Ni Wong]

E R R O R

[ALBERT ALEXANDER STONIER]

Fun overloaded programs will be updated as an extravagant stuff.

[Prince Marx]

Nice

[Faruq Sujan]

Matlab loves

[Saeed Ullah khan]

Matlab is a good tool

[Andrei Luca]

What was Hodor's name if he was using matlab ?

Holdon;

[Gareth Thomas]

t = linspace(-pi,pi, 350);
X = t .* sin( pi * sin(t)./t);
Y = -abs(t) .* cos( pi * sin(t)./t);
plot(X,Y);
fill(X, Y, 'r');
set(gcf, 'Position', get(0,'Screensize'));
title('Happy Birthday!', 'FontSize', 28);

[Mustafa Gök]

Matlab is an eraser, pen and notebook for engineers. - New World - :))

[ashvinee]

good one

[Dhiraj Kumar Muthyala]

Matlab is pun

[Aditya Rajawat]

Good question

[Jonathan Winfield]

Why did I divide sine by tan? Just cos I can!

[aviram aviv]

why do 6 afraid of 7? cos 7 8 9

[ONKAR SALUNKHE]

Matlab(In English) Matlab(In Hindi) ?

[Lovish]

What did the zero say to the eight? ::::Nice Belt::: "0 turns 8"

[Sreejeesh SG]

if you plot 8 and 0 on X and Y , who will be on Z?

[aldi andika]

where can i find guide for GUIDE ?

[Marco]

Matlab is like some kind of a religion, if he doesn't know the answer then he send you a NaN (misspelling of Nun)

[Bhuvnesh Rathor]

matlab is very intresting in simulation if we connect low value device to high capacity then matlab always answered

[jwiix]

i: Be rational! pi: Get real!

[Sangram]

Matlab please marry me.

[Sonal Joshi]

If you read MATLAB in Hindi, it would be मतलब which means 'Meaning'?!

[Vladimir Glavac]

Life is complex: it has both real and imaginary components.

[Tan Huynh Ngoc]

MATLAB I am curious you

[john marino]

Q: Why do mathematicians like parks?

A: Because of all the natural logs.

[Gowtham Sandeep Nainala]

Tonight We Matlab in Hell

[Rahat Ali Khan Langah]

I hop there will a fun toolbox in MATLAB. Set the parameters and keep laughing.

[Mathan Chandran]

matlab jokes and pun are not visible to me. I don't know why

[Mathan Chandran]

I don't like to see that matlab accepts subroutines on jokes and puns.

[Larry Kyrala]

There once was a humble developer,

Who tried simulating a propellerer,

'When it tries to spin

The out flows in,'

But backwards his model ran betterer.

- Larry Kyrala (In response to a coworker asking how to write a clean limerick rhyming with 'developer'. 2009-02-20)

[Jochen Schuettler]

K>> last_err
Undefined function or variable 'last_err'.

Did you mean:
K>> lasterr

ans =

Undefined function or variable 'last_err'.

[Jacob]

Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with pencil and paper.

[Xiangrui Li]

Like this one!

[Joshua]

Did you ever hear the joke about the Matlab toolbox equivalent to a poor poet's handbook?....Yeah, me neither.

[Alessandro Cesetti]

Have you ever heard about MATLAB toolbox that prepares you a coffee? Be sure to have MOKA port on your laptop!!!

[Rajeev H V]

MATLAB matlab(in Hindi) MATLAB!!

[pankaj mathur]

i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...

[Devesh Kumar]

imagesc(get(gcf,'PointerShapeCData')); colormap([0 0 0 ; 1 1 .5]); axis image; axis off; set(gcf,'pointer','custom')

[pankaj mathur]

i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...

[Priyabrata Panigrahi]

I fell in love when i first MET-LAB. So i continued working in LAB as scientist...hehe ;)

[Lokendra rathore]

I thought it is METH LAB so I came here.

[Wilujeng Fitri Alfiah]

[pankaj mathur]

i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...

[Shefali Ramteke]

seriously??? cool stuff dude! yeah this inbuilt code is indeed over the top! :P :D :D

[Muhammad Aslam]

I am surprised to see this stuff seriously :))))

[SamAli]

You can Excel with MATLAB ;)

[Dinesh Nahar]

i am fully amazed with its functions

[Julie Mason]

Q: Why do mathematicians like parks?

A: Because of all the natural logs.

[Morgan Menke]

power(byThe, MATLAB)

[Lanh Van Nguyen]

>> doc Matlab jokes or puns

[Parvez Rafi]

To mathematicians, solutions mean finding the answers. But to chemists, solutions are things that are still all mixed up.

[Juan Ant]

why a turtle is so slow ?? mmmm let me think... what are you exactly asking FOR ?? ... maybe no one is waiting FOR ... FOR example, with other animals ...

[sam moor]

matlab joke

[Kane Byles]

If I had a Labrador named Matt to follow me around, my life would be complete.

[Shuggs]

->insert matlab pun function here

[Sarah Norred]

A: "What is the integral of 1/cabin?"

B: "log cabin."

A: "Nope, houseboat--you forgot the C."

[Le Duy]

function fun()

   printf('Have fun!');
end

[Huan-Yang Chang]

good answer!

[Sampath Kumar]

Good one..ha ha

[Eross Janos]

Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you? Customer: Hello... I can't print. Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and... Customer: Listen pal, don't start getting technical! I'm not Bill G...

[Sivasathivel]

[ning hongkai]

NICE~

[Praneeth kumar]

nice

[Praneeth kumar]

want to know about matlab f... ! , it's stuck as usual. "help f..." suggest that f... is funny.

[kulandhaivadivel s]

Good One

[Anoop Sasidharan]

Really good

[Treesa Tomy]

oH...gOD

[Vishnu T]

Very good!

[Manikanta Nallagatla]

COOL

[Benedictor Alexander Nguchu]

LastName = {'Smith';'Johnson';'Williams';'Jones';'Brown'};
Character = ['lazy1';'short';'urgly'; 'sleep';'talke'];
EyesFeature = ['sqaur';'recta';'brown';'Bluee';'spher'];
T = table(Character,EyesFeature,'RowNames',LastName);
>> T

T = 

                  Character    EyesFeature
                  _________    ___________

      Smith       lazy1        sqaur      
      Johnson     short        recta      
      Williams    urgly        brown      
      Jones       sleep        Bluee      
      Brown       talke        spher  

[Abhay Alok]

@@Amazing@@